You are amazing!
That is something I want to know how to be able to say to someone. I don’t think I have ever been able to tell someone what I think about them in person. Instead I write letters. I love writing letters because I can tell people exactly how much I admire them without seeming completely socially awkward. But this post isn’t about letter writing. This post is about the people I admire. The few that are always there, standing out in the crowds.
No matter where I am I always seem to find a few people that amaze me. Their kindness and friendliness and open-mindedness never cease to amaze me. They are the people I look up to, idolize even. To me these people are like gods (not like God but more like Hercules or Achilles type gods). I admire these people so much that I am irresistibly drawn to them. However, I also feel incredibly unworthy of their presence. I wonder why they would chose to socialize with me when I am not at their level of pure awesomeness.
I know it probably sounds funny how much I idolize these people, but to me they are better than movie stars. They are the people that I watch as they walk by, that I crave conversations with, that I want to be around because they give me hope. It is these few people that I never felt worthy to be called their friend, but they are the few people I’ve ever been able to call my friends.
I think you have to be pretty amazing to talk to me, to make me feel important and of worth. I mean, who am I? I’m not a super friendly person or a super spiritual person or a super nice person. I’m just a regular person with lots of problems. So in general, there’s no reason for people to talk to me.
That’s why I look up to those people that do talk to me and others like me. I look up to the people that reach out to others and make them feel of worth. I look up to the people that could be comfortable with their group of friends, but instead chose to help others feel important.
I want to be like that someday.
I want to be able to talk to the regular people out there that want to feel important. I want to be a friend to the friendless and a person that makes others feel happier by their sheer presence. But most of all, I just want to be able to say hi to others. Hello is the beginning of a beautiful thing and someday I want to able to initiate the creation of one of these conversations.
So, to the few that give light to my life, thank you. You are amazing.