Being a friend

People have always been amazed when I make friends with a complete stranger or socialize with someone when I could easily pass them by, but I’ve often wondered why. I mean, anyone can talk to someone else. All you have to do is make the decision. The trick is, of course, whether or not the conversation goes well… but the actual talking isn’t such a big deal.

I’ve said on here before how I have a hard time saying hi to people, but sometimes you can just skip the hi. Sometimes you can just say how are you? or what’s up? or mind if I join you? And then usually the other person can do the rest. It’s not so hard to make a friend once you’ve made yourself known.

What usually goes through my mind is what could I ever say to them? Then, what do I know about them? Then, how do I bring that up? After that, I either just go for it or get out.

The problem is that I know that if I just get out I won’t feel good about it later. Even if I try and fail, it’s better than not trying at all. One time when I was at a bus stop with this lady, I wanted to say something to her and I finally got the courage to do it… and then… she didn’t hear me. So… it doesn’t always work out. But I am always happier when I do try instead of not trying at all and never knowing whether it would have made a difference.

It all comes down to just being a friend. Even if you don’t know what to say, just go to someone’s level. Be sad with them or happy with them or lonely with them. Just be there with them. You don’t have to have the right thing to say or know how to fix their problems- just being there can make all the difference in the world.

So, my advice to all of you is to go be a friend to someone. Whether it’s someone you know already or someone you’ve never met, we could all use more friends and more time with friends. Just be a friend.

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8 thoughts on “Being a friend

    • I don’t know if you’ve ever seen Rugrats, but there’s this kid in there named Chuckie that’s super scared all the time. Anyway, in the Rugrats in Paris movie he tells himself “I’ve got to be brave; I’ve got to be brave.” Sometimes I say that to myself too.
      Starting a conversation with someone is one of the scariest things ever for me because I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing. It’s like going bungee jumping for the first time and not knowing if the cord will really hold you or not… but once you do it, it’s the most amazing feeling ever. Sometimes it doesn’t work out so well, but sometimes I go away from the conversation smiling for hours. And it’s because of those times that I keep on doing it no matter how hard it seems because if I can feel that good for a few hours, it was totally worth being brave for a few minutes.

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      • Wow. Yeah! This made me smile!
        I haven’t seen that movie, but I guess that’s a good think to tell ourselves. Maybe one day I’ll get that far. For now I’ll be brave and go outside at all. But hell yeah, getting to know someone or sharing a conversation with someone new it’s amazing. I wish anxiety could leave me alone already.

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