Anxiously Engaged

This past week I finished a six-week course on our purpose in life. The class addressed a lot of different topics and discussed how we can be more spiritual and just a better person in general. Anyway, one thing we talked about is staying anxiously engaged, which basically means being mentally present in everything you do and consistently working toward your purpose.

So the past few weeks I have been working on being anxiously engaged. It definitely hasn’t been easy. Especially because I’ve been feeling myself slip back into depression. But… focusing on being actively involved in other things and trying to improve myself in positive ways has probably helped a lot to keep me out of major depression. And I have definitely had quite a few positive experiences as a result of my efforts.

I have been able to help people in unexpected ways. I have been able to help fill others’ needs. I have become incredibly efficient in my work and found ways to improve my job. I have written new poems and songs. I have read new books and learned new skills. And I’ve been more understanding and more attentive to the needs of others.

I can’t say that life has changed dramatically or that my problems have become easier or decreased in any way, but I have felt better about myself and what I’m doing with my life. Life isn’t always easy and I have struggled more lately than I have in the last two or three years, but as I focus on staying anxiously engaged, I can at least feel hope that the future will be better.

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