High Functioning

What does that really mean?

Honestly, for me, it means that I’m really good at not doing what I want to do.

It means that when I want to be happy, I hold it in. And when I want to break down, I hold it in. And when I want to rock back and forth or flap or touch walls as I walk by or yell at people or jump up and down, I don’t.

So… don’t tell me I don’t have autism because I hold it in. Don’t tell me I don’t have problems because you don’t see me going crazy in the corner. I’m still going crazy; I’m just doing it where you can’t see it.

Yes, I’m high functioning… but that may not mean what you think it means…


Welcome to the Sensory Blog Hop — a monthly gathering of posts from sensory bloggers hosted by The Sensory Spectrum and The Jenny Evolution. Click on the links below to read stories from other bloggers about what it’s like to have Sensory Processing Disorder and to raise a sensory kiddo! Want to join in on next month’s Sensory Blog Hop? Click here!


12 thoughts on “High Functioning

  1. This post made more sense to me than anything I’ve read today. I wish you didn’t feel like you had to hold it all in and were free to be exactly who you are without having to censor yourself. Everyone deserves that….sometimes society is just so messed up.


    • Yeah… I have paid the price to try to fit in… And it hasn’t really worked very well anyway… So maybe I should just let it out… But I’ve held things in so long, it seems almost impossible to be free at this point.


    • Yeah, I don’t usually think about it very much. The reason I was thinking about it for this post was because of a situation that happened at church and a comment my friend made. I just wish people realized how hard it is even though sometimes people make it look easy.


  2. Absolutely! So many people say to me that my son seems “normal” or that he doesn’t have Sensory Processing Disorder… but he’s expending a lot of energy holding it in and holding it together. Then at home, it all explodes!

    Thanks for being a part of the sensory blog hop!

    Jennifer @ The Jenny Evolution, The Sensory Spectrum


    • Yeah, it’s easy to say that someone doesn’t have any problems when you don’t see the problems. But you also don’t see the inside struggle they go through. It’s hard trying to seem normal while still knowing that it’s not what comes naturally.


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