I have this friend that basically knows I’m not okay. So she messages me pretty much every day to see how I’m doing and if I have eaten that day and just checks in with me.
I know I shouldn’t need that. I’m an adult. I should be able to handle myself and not have someone check to see if I’m meeting my needs. But… It is so helpful…
Teetering on the verge of depression, struggling with health issues, and fighting off anxiety is a lot to handle on my own. And even though I tell myself I can do it, I often don’t want to. I don’t feel like it’s worth the effort. I don’t feel like I’m worth the effort. But… Knowing that this friend will check in with me, knowing she may ask if I have eaten, I do eat, I do try, I do keep going.
Sometimes people feel like they have to do these great things for us. When you tell someone you think about suicide, they feel like they have to save you in some big way. But the truth is, it’s the little things that save us. It’s the everyday, mundane things like asking if we ate that day that ultimately saves our lives over and over.
So… Thank you. Thank you to this dear friend that saves me a million tears, a thousand lonely nights, and simply saves my life a hundred times over. And thank you to all my friends and all of you whose continual love and care keep me going when everything tells me to stop.