What You See

I bought a house a couple months ago. My mom cosigned on it, but I am planning on paying for it myself through renters and such. It feels somewhat strange to buy such a large house at 28 years old. My neighbors are all much older than me and my sister (who lives with me). Plus, they are all married, and most have children.

The thing is though, we all only see what is on the surface. I look at my neighbors and see people who are at a totally different point in their lives than I am. They probably look at me and think the same thing. Some people may even be jealous of me. People tell me that they weren’t even considering buying a house at my age. Others look at my house and tell me how lucky I am to have this place. I do feel very fortunate to have this house and for the lot I have been given in life, but there are definitely things I long for in my life.

It is easy to look at my life on Facebook and think that I have things pretty good. I have a house that is now fully furnished. I have a decent job that pays my bills. I have a college degree and am well on my way towards a second degree. I am doing well physically and mentally and even emotionally most of the time. But, you don’t see all the other things that have happened in the midst of all this. You don’t see that shortly after I bought the house, I had to fix the heater, then my car, and then the garage door, and I will eventually have to replace a damaged sprinkler pipe. You also may not know that I used money from a car accident settlement to make the down payment, and you don’t see that I have been searching for a new job because I haven’t been given enough hours at work to pay my bills now. But the biggest thing that no one ever sees is the longing in my heart for something more.

I know that I am incredibly lucky and blessed to have my family and friends and my new house, but… I really want someone to share it with. I have my sister here, which definitely helps, but I would love to have a husband and children. I wouldn’t mind living in a rundown trailer if it meant having a family of my own.

We all have something we long for. Some people long for stability while others long for adventure. Some long for riches while others would give away their riches for true love. No life is perfect, no matter how much it may seem to be so on social media. We all long for something. Just remember that what you see is just the surface of someone’s life, and you can miss the beauty of your life by constantly comparing to the surface of someone else’s.

Voices of Special Needs Blog Hop

Welcome to Voices of Special Needs Blog Hop — a monthly gathering of posts from special needs bloggers hosted by The Sensory Spectrum and The Mommy Evolution. Click on the links below to read stories from other bloggers about having a special needs kiddo — from Sensory Processing Disorder to ADHD, from Autism to Dyslexia! Want to join in on next month’s Voices of Special Needs Hop? Click here!

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2 thoughts on “What You See

  1. I happen to know a boy on the spectrum who very much shares your dream. He’s brilliant and funny and kind and handsome and creative and funny and to me perfect in every way.

    But yes, despite his wonderful qualities, it may be harder for him to find that special someone, too.

    I’m not saying that those of us on the spectrum have to be with only others on the spectrum. But I do think it requires a respect for neurodiversity to be with a neurodiverse person. And I know those people are out there.

    And I hope you AND my son will find that love you hope to share and so richly deserve.

    Thanks and love,
    Full Spectrum Mama

    Liked by 1 person

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